THREE GUYS AND… GODZILLA
series created by Marvin Mercer and Nick Stephenson
“GODZILLA: RANKING THE MILLENNIUM ERA KAIJUS”
written by Dominick Cappello
If you want to check out the Heisei Era list first…
GODZILLA: RANKING THE HEISEI ERA KAIJUS
Alright, this will be my final ranking of Kaijus because it will likely be a decade or so before there will be enough sequels to “Shin Godzilla,” Toho’s most recent reboot, and that’s assuming there will be Kaijus for Shin Godzilla to battle. The sequels could be about – SPOILERS!!! – those creepy humanoid monsters hatching out the tip of its tail. But, I digress. The Millennium series was odd in that five of the six films were reboots. “Godzilla: Tokyo SOS” was the only film to acknowledge the previous one. Again, Mothra and Rodan won’t be included because they were pretty much the same as they’ve always been. That goes for any Kaiju from “Godzilla: Final Wars” which was in a previous rankings and not updated in any significant way. Angurius, King Caesar, Kumonga (the giant spider), Ebirah (the sea monster), and the Son of Godzilla were all pretty much the same and I have nothing new to say about them.
8. Zilla from “Godzilla: Final Wars” (2004). Look who had the stones to show his face in a Toho film. The giant iguana from “Godzilla” (1998). Toho named him Zilla because he’s not good enough to be GODzilla. They only made him an official Kaiju so the real Godzilla could bitch-slap him.
7. Manda & Kamacura from “Godzilla: Final Wars” (2004). A tie for seventh place. These benchwarmers didn’t make the cut when I ranked the Showa series, so I put them on this list for the heck of it. Manda the sea serpent isn’t too bad, but the giant praying mantis is quite lame.
6. Baragon from “Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack (2001). Another “Destroy All Monsters” (1968) alumnus. In this film, he is resurrected along with Mothra and King Ghidorah to try and stop Godzilla, but he wasn’t important enough to have his name be in the film’s title.
5. Megaguirus from “Godzilla vs. Megaguirus” (2000). Bugs from “Rodan” (1956) evolve into Megaguirus. Like Battra, it’s a more badass version of Mothra, but not as cool as Battra in my opinion.
4. Orga from “Godzilla 2000” (1999). The Cloverfield monster on steroids. Actually, it was created by DNA stolen from Godzilla by a UFO. A bit lumbering and it actually tried to swallow Godzilla whole. Big mistake.
3. Monster X from “Godzilla: Final Wars” (2004). Well, it turns out to be King Ghidorah incognito. The only Kaiju to make all three of my rankings. Monster X harkens back to when Ghidorah was Monster Zero in “Invasion of the Astro-Monster” (1965).
2. Gigan from “Godzilla: Final Wars” (2004). Gigan’s first appearance since the Showa series. He was given an upgrade with his hook hands being replaced by chainsaws. What!? Chainsaws!? Awesome!
1. Kiryu from “Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla” (2002). The third iteration of Mechagodzilla was constructed around the bones of the original Godzilla. That’s very cool. Original Godzilla vs. reboot Godzilla. Imagine Daniel Craig battling a robot Sean Connery. Fight of the century.